my blog

I've always read other peoples blogs and have always wanted to start my own.  I have enjoyed how blogs can chronicle their lives and their childrens lives.  I thinks it's a great way of peers learning from each other and great to know that your not alone in the chaos of life.  It's strange to me how we all have people, experiences, and things in our lives that make us so similiar.  I truley believe that we can learn something from every single person in our lives.  I am a better mother, sister, daughter, friend and wife because of the people around me.

I am a mom of 3 beautiful children.  I am married to a wonderful man, who litterly walked into my life one day and has thankfully never left my side.  My daughters are little divas that make me laugh everyday.  My son is a blessing to our family and to our lives.

One week ago our family recieved the news that changed are lives forever.  It was a simple phone call but it's effects will direct the remainder of my son's life.

Our child physcologist called me while I was at work and asked if I had a few minutes to go over the testing results.  I knew what she was going to say, so why not.  She confirmed the speculation that Alex was autistic and went over a couple of things (i zoned out).  I wasn't surprised by the results but it was still hard to hear.  I sat at my desk and teared up for about 5 minutes.  It's not that I was upset that my speculations were verified it was the fact that my son would have this "thing" that he would have to deal with his whole life.  It will effect every part of his life.  Relationships and school will always be a challenge and no mother wants their child to struggle thru life.

After my 5 minute pity party I remembered his smiling face and quickly got out of it.  There so many other things that are worse than this diagnosis and I decided that instead of being scared I was going to be my sons champion.  I will help him in anyway I can.  There is so much still to learn about Autism but I will learn a little each day and find his strengths and work on them.

Even though he is autistic that's only one facet of him, he is a jewel and has many other attributes that make him who he is.   My "Buddah" (that's his nickname) is one of the sweetest little boys you can ever meet. His smile and laugh are infectious and if he knows you well enough to be one of those in his very tight circle (there's only 6 of us) you have felt his hugs.  No little person has ever hugged me so tight.  He may not be able to talk to me and let me know he loves me but I can feel it in his great bear hug.

I started reading a little into the subject and found a great website and a beginners manual for those that have concerns about autism or for those recently diagnosed.  It's a scary diagnosis but the information has helped me to understand just a little more.

100 Day Kit - Autism Speaks

I started this today to put my feeling to words, I've got so much in me and sometimes you've got to let it out.  In some ways it's been cathartic and I feel better, thanks for reading!